Another scary step on the journey, and we took it last week. We were very nervous, because we were about to come face-to-face with the foster mum who’d apparently done wonders with our future child. She was going to judge us as parents – which we’re not yet – and on our potential relationship with a little person- who we haven’t met yet.
And speaking of the little person – it’s weird how you can form such a strong connection to someone who exists for you only on paper. We know all about its medical history and eagerly seize on the scraps of information that powers-that-be choose to share with us. So since Foster Mum came to the meeting with a book of up-to-date photos, and plenty of anecdotes about our new addition, that was a major tick for her. But then she wasn’t the one who needed ticks.
We needn’t have worried. Foster Mum couldn’t have been more friendly. She was clearly just apprehensive about who she was handing over her charge to – a charge who she’s built a brilliant relationship with and was going to have to say goodbye to. I will never understand how they are able to do that. Respect.
We talked about us and who we were. We asked lots of questions and, although we got answers, they feel kind of generic still. “X is into everything.” “X will eat anything.” I’m not sure whether it was actually unsatisfactory or whether we just won’t be satisfied with anything less than the real deal any more.
Along with the assembled social workers, we worked out a rough schedule for introductions – assuming we’re approved at panel of course! It will be a pretty intense week of getting-to-know-you sessions, but it’s still a good few weeks away. Meanwhile, the house is stacking up with toys, books, a car seat, clothes, a cot, a changing mat – you name it, we’re on it.
In other news, we got our invitation to panel through yesterday- and it’s next week! Move over changing stations, hello panic stations.
In the meantime, we’re torn between gratitude for the woman who gave our (hopefully) child a safe and nurturing home before it joined our family – and fear that we can’t possibly match up. We will, of course. Because I’m beginning to think that no two people have ever wanted anything more.